A half painted portrait of a glass half full.

Hey kids, lets do something fun today. Lets learn about me, a 27 year old failure that's destined for a life of nothing, with the imagination to be something and the promotional skills of that football team you haven't heard of, exactly, that made no sense, why? because you haven't heard of them and that's the point I'm getting to.

I can't sell myself, maybe like that, but probably not because I'm getting fat in old age. I convinced someone far to beautiful and clever to marry me, so much so when I proposed I told her I was miserable but the only person I wanted to be miserable with was her. Charmer right! Get in line.

So why this post? Because every so often I realise I'm a wasted talent, and how do I know that? because I tend to know more about games than the people working in the games stores. I consume so much media in the subject it frustrates me that I have no way of sharing it with anyone. I talk at my partner, 'At' being the key word in that small sentence.

So for probably the fourth or fifth time in my life I had a 'Fuck it' moment and decided to try all over again. Now I've suffered a lot in the past two years, I'm incredibly open about the subject matter because I don't let my illness define me, until it defines me and I become a living nightmare, but after that experience and years of being told to express myself I wrote a blog, It was terrible, badly spelt and I can't even remember what it was about, but after all that I'd done it.

Seems as this is a relaunch like Marvel Now or DC Rebirth I'll fill you in with the fact I'm Bipolar. Don't know what that is? Google it. It's awful. I love it.

Step one done, It had been read, when I logged in the next day not just once but actually 100 times in total, that blew my already blown up mind.

My anxiety of expressing myself had disappeared as I'd taken a step, a baby step but an incredibly theraputic one, an incredibly brave one. It helped me so much over an awful period in my life where I felt lost and helpless, an outlet for an incredibly frustrated, outspoken and anxious person. I stuck too it for months, I kept at it for months, every day, every other day, every week, once a month, now.

Now in that time i'd had some experiences with different things, all hugely positive but then the defining illness came and fucked me hard and forgot the lube. I was writing for an American website, a start up. I covered news and reviews for games, I adored it. I stopped.

Twitch, oh man was it addictive! I got to be myself on camera and people loved it, I played games, I got angry I gained a small gathering of 300 followers in 2 months. I stopped.

So when I was fucked by illness my brain shut down, basic things are impossible, all my aspirations and dreams fall away from me and reality becomes a dream. Life is better when your living in your own deluded brain, Joke all you will about Bipolar. Every person I've ever told has no fucking clue what it is. They tell me to smile and get over it.

I remember thinking someone was in my house and saw them in the kitchen, I remember trying to jump out of a car on a dual carriageway, being under 24 hour care, every time I was in public I wanted to run in front of a car and just fucking end it. I remember everything being brighter and talking so fast and nothing making any sense, I remember being awake for a week, I don't remember my brain being put under so much of an emotional beating that according to my psychaitrists record I had Amnesia for 6 weeks. I'll smile and get over that alright, sure my family where thinking the same thing whilst going through that experience. Thrown into the mix whilst this is going on is an addictive personality that over consumes everything and over analyses every small detail.

100% or 0%. I have no in between. I stopped.

Here we are again, after stopping when things were going the right way for me I decided to start again, I know right. Does it matter? Will I do it all over again? Maybe, but I have to try.

So what will I be doing? Well I'm obsessed with Gaming. I want to write about it, how? However I feel relevant. Reviews, discussions, very informal and all over the place like a Childs story. Mostly on a wall in crayon. I'm also interested in discussing my illness, games, routine and how to manage things when they seem impossible.

Basically I want to be blunt and honest with myself and everyone else, It might be polarising and not for everyone, but every time I have an opinion on a matter it is normally backed up by a fact, I look into what I disagree with also so I can see the opinion from both sides. Sounds like something everyone should do, but I've got into heated conversations with people when I've known more about their opinions point than they have.

I look at the Idea of video games through a magnifying glass. I often take to Twitter to say thank you to Indie developers for an amazing soundtrack or piece of art, sending them my reviews so they know what I thought about my experience, I want them to know how I got to the final result.

I buy the soundtracks, look into the history of the studio and try and buy the back catalogue, the artists involved with creating the feel and tone of the game and the writers telling the overall story. When you look deeper you get more of an appreciation for whats gone into it, tying that whole experience together.

Take away the music and background sound from Bioshock and play it, The game becomes so much easier, what you didn't realise was dictating your pace and that anxious feeling in your gut was the one thing you pay no attention too whilst emerged in that experience, take it away and it becomes a shooter with no jumps or build ups through sound alone.

Probably the most memorable soundtrack that I've brought recently was 'Everybody's Gone To The Rapture' by Jessica Curry. That soundtrack alone is enough to make you cry it's that beautiful, tied with an experience that is literally out of this world. She won a BAFTA for the soundtrack after I'd tweeted her, not that my tweet made that happen but, understandably so, its absolute bliss.

Other stupid facts about me are I have a huge tattoo of Cloud on my forearm, Final Fantasy VII is my ultimate favourite game, Being told not to play something because you won't understand it is all the fuel I need to play a game. I may also want to Call my Children Cloud and Ruby. Nothing to do with Final Fantasy VII at all!

I live in a small room in my grandparents home surrounded by comforts, firstly art from games framed on My wall. The Iconic Image of Joel and Ellie from The Last of us and an A3 image of Elizabeth falling from Columbia whilst Booker tries to catch her.

Drake also lives in my room. One form poster and the other a 3ft Cardboard cut out I may have borrowed from GAME.

I love collectors edition and art books also, I wish I could draw like those talented people. Probably my favourite is the art book for Witcher Wild Hunt.

Slowly I'm collecting more models but my favourite I own is Red from Transistor, Artists Jen Zee is literally insane and anything Super Giant Games touches I will throw my money at! I'm looking at you Pyre! Annoyingly though after again tweeting her to see if I could buy some original art she informed my its all digital, I cry.

Then we have all those Andrzej Sapkowski books, Oh how I love you. Next tattoo is for sure the wolf medallion on my hand. A polish writer who originally wrote the novels and short stories about Geralt before CD PROJEKT RED, a polish company also, Created that amazing world in real life.

So thats it, a small informed look into my life and the thing I love, GAMES.

One day I will make a name for my self, I don't want fame, I don't want fortune, I just want to entertain and help people.

Not sure what to call this? A diary in a sense. A half painted portrait of a glass half full.

A relaunch.

So yes I do have Twitter and Instagram, Currently I'm writing angry emails to Hello Games for selling me a game that's so broken its's crashed on me 18 times in 3 days.

Fuck you Sean Murray. I've got beef. You looked like the coolest person in the world selling your stolen Ideas. Then when it releases you change your tone immediately.

No paid DLC! free updates for every one, 7 days after launch, Might have to pay for that DLC ladies and gentlemen, maybe that'll contain a finished game! we all know it's Elite: Dangerous meets Minecraft and Johan Gielis's "Superformula" anyway. All I wanted was Joe Danger 3. I will get a refund. It may take a while but I will get my £70 back. why £70? because I brought the collectors edition because it came with an art book and steal case/comic. Fix it!

But enough about me being so mad I nearly broke my TV.

My Twitter is @winslowbateman
My Instagram is www.instagram.com/fi5h5tick5/
also I have Twitch www.twitch.tv/fi5h5tick5/profile

So come give me a follow, comment on what you like and share if you can as it would mean the world to me, I have a crappy back catalog of 71 posts on my blogspot so I'm sure one thing might entertain you.

Till next time people,

Caleb, FI5H5TICK5.

Today I thought of you.

So I've been hugely busy over the past few weeks, I've been an usher at my best friends wedding, I've travelled Novigrad, Velen and Skellige and write a lot of news articles and reviews for the Nerd Stash.

Everything seems to be going in the right direction for me at the minute and then I thought of you.
'You' being the blog, Its easy to neglect and forget about when your putting so much time and effort into your passion, I'm eternally grateful to Jeremy for giving me this opportunity and I loving every minute I spend in this little gaming hub, and free games!

I love free games.

So in true 'Ive left my blog for two weeks or longer fashion' I decided to write another one updating the world with this online diary I've taken to writing.

What started the neglect was The Witcher 3: The Wild Hunt, I always new the time would come where I switched off from real life and turn Geralts story into my own. In true RPG nerd fashion that happened and its all I wanted to do for two weeks, then work got in the way and I reviewed one good game and one bad game, The bad game being a mobile port of 'Badland' it just seemed like a huge cash in to me, trying to make a quick buck by taking its mobile success and applying it to the console world, more original Xbox than Xbox One material.

The good being a weird and whacky game called 'Schrodingers Cat and The Raiders of The Lost Quark' A truly unique mechanic making this a true stand out!

Quarks are adorable also! End of.

If you haven't check out the website please do, we have multiple social media pages set up and the team works really hard to try and bring all the happening news to the readers in the own unique fashion. Creative freedom being key, if you want to write it then do it, and with the run up to E3 being four days away the excitement and nerves are running high to try and make our first expo a success.

New YouTube content has been created with affiliated sites offering sign up discounts on first purchases, we had our first Twitch stream of Hearthstone as well which was a success, also looking at creating some new content for our YouTube channel myself after practising with my few videos, so hopefully that will take off more as time goesby and Podcasts are the works, making us a fully fledged member of the gaming journalism world.

On the BiPolar side of things stuff is starting to look up for once, my medication has been altered once again and slowly but surely I'm getting back to my old self minus any sort of confidence, No longer does Risperidon rain havoc on my morning route making me one squishy faced tired sleepy head and with my Venlafaxine being upped I'm a lot more chirpier than normal, give it two more months and I'll be off Risperidone completely and it'll just be Venlafaxine and Sodium Valproate.

I'm starting to look at my diagnosis as a huge blessing in surprise, going from a hollow shell of a man with the idea and desire to write but no drive to do it and I've gone from starting a blog to working at a new company bring news and reviews to the masses, I'm completely overwhelmed by the experience especially when you have publishers and developers thanking you for the great review and quoting you in the tweet.

This quote being ' Final thoughts, I want a purple cat now' as Schrodingers Cat was a game that would have gone completely under my radar , I'm so happy it didn't though as I had a huge amount of fun with that game as well as a swift 850 gamer score to add to my now 88500 plus gamer score.

Ive neglected my Xbox One recently and playing the Smite Beta and others has made me re kindle my passion for gamer score, I might love my PS4 more but nothing will beat the gamer score, trophies just don't have the same appeal to me, even though I still try my balls off to get them.

I'm going to look at starting my Gunman Clive play through soon and finish that part of my life and story and start something new.

I'm working on a new Let's play about Donkey Kong at the minute. I Have the content I just need to find the time to edit and do it, hopefully once I start to get abit of structure in my day I can focus on getting my working life and content in check and keep on top of it.

So onwards and upwards, everything changing for the better, its just taking time.
I never thought I would feel like this 3 months ago and 3 months before that I never thought I would feel again.

My adventure is still new but growing every day and I hope you enjoy my little story today.

Also I got a sweet Dragonball tattoo on my fore arm with Kid Goku flying Nimbus around the 2 and 6 star Dragonball signifying the day I was born on, meaningful and all that jazz.

Koi Koi

Caleb ManicallyDepressed-ModeratelyFunny.

That awkward 20%

I went through a phase of trying to finish my ever growing list of titles I have yet to complete, it's safe to say that phase is over and I'm in the '20' percent phase.

He suffered the wrath of 29%

This is a place where you put in enough hours to start the game and invest a significant amount of hours growing your character to a good enough level to no longer feel a complete noob but still a fair distance away form being something unstoppable.

I named it this as my ps4 trophy list is slowly filling with titles sitting around that mark.

Some lucky, others not so.

FarCry 4 falling into that now troubled group of games, it wasn't lucky enough to stay on my shelf, Will i keep playing? Have I seen enough. Ive done like 29 percent of the complete game, I think I'll trade it in, if i want to finish it I'll get it at another point.

Unity fell next at 24%

Assassins Creed Unity - Hey Edward or mmmm Ezio. nope uhhhhhh Conway ? Altair. How invested am I right now, 24 percent. Ive seen enough to call it a day I think, worse case scenario I'll buy it when its cheap.

This is a problem I keep falling into.

Borderlands The pre sequel - 31% (close enough)
Lego Batman 3 Beyond Gotham - 27%
Dying Light - 21%
The Last of Us - 2 Play throughs - 10%

Don't even get me started on the under 10% games I currently have started either.

Does anyone else suffer this problem where you start something new, put a few hours in, get invested only to change to something else and fear going back to that game?

Maybe Dying Light just shit me up enough to keep me from going back to it as night time is something else.

I started it and 2 hours later it was 100% done.

Sometimes It means I finish a bunch of games at the same time, most times it means I trade them in un finished for something else. Thank God for PS Plus or i would own no titles at all these days.

Still this hasn't stopped the problem from happening I just own titles I want to play that I know ill never get round to at the minute like Never Alone and Abe's Odyssey. Why not just start them? Because Batman will suffer the wrath of trade in value next and I want to try Platinum that one as its seems rather easy.

I was all on track to publish this article two days ago, i was on a role and then out of nowhere came the urge to play Minecraft, maybe it was all that Achievement Hunter that id been watching? so i downloaded it, so i owned it forever, I phoned my brother and said get on that hype and he joined me.

That was two days ago and Batman is now in that fucking pile I'm talking about with the Pre Sequel and Dying Light, I won't trade them in as I'll get The Witcher 3 Wild Hunt on May 19th and my world will come to a full stop.

I always maintained it was like a drug and it really is!

You'll be happy to know Minecraft is at 52percent so far,
so its held my attention for the most amount of hours anything has in a long time, maybe since Super Smash Bros Wii U.


Anyway people let me Know if you struggle with that awkward 20 percent and enjoy your Friday.


Koi Koi

Caleb ManicallyDepressed-ModeratelyFunny.

Remastered games - A must or a must not?

Now I keep seeing updates on Remastered games becoming available.

Just shut up and take my money.

I get the appeal, but are to many games trying to cash in on getting re released and getting that extra cash bump?

Now I can see certain titles falling into the category of 'must play', like the Last of Us, it was one of the reasons I brought my ps4 for, I would have never of experienced it on ps3 and missed that story and experience all together.

But do I need a Darksiders 2 remastered? No.

I suppose its a bit of a double edged sword and an argument you can't really win or lose, you can have an opinion and everyone is welcome to theirs even if its wrong in my eyes.

I just feel as the days go by, this console cycle has turned into a somewhat remastered hash machine, now aren't we suppose to be pushing the limits with the games publishers are developing at the minute and getting new games?

10 out of 10 would play.

Saying all this though I've fallen into the trend myself, mostly out of there not really being many games to choose from these days.

My PS4 being somewhat an Indie machine.

I said I wouldn't get Borderlands The Handsome Collection and I did, this was justified by not playing the Pre Sequel and its DLC and never playing the Borderlands 2 DLC, this made sense to me, a game I could also coop with my girlfriend and play casually over time dropping in and out whenever I played it.

Then we come to Saints Row IV, this being an odd title that I brought and played for 5 hours, I think I was trying to scratch my Sunset Overdrive itch and couldn't quite reach it so thought that would work, I was wrong. £25 wrong.

I have all the intent to go back to it at some point in the future again dropping in with a very casual approach to the game, a few hours of mayhem then back to the daily grind called life.

When it comes to value for money though some games just absolutely kill it and they are very hard to ignore like the Halo Master Chief Collection, but even games held in such high prestige suffer the downside of never working properly online from day one, so much so early adopters of the game through the months of November and December will also be getting the Halo ODST campaign free of charge when its released later in the year.

Can't wait!

I guess you can't argue with die hard fans and there hands full of 'Shut up and take my money' cash.

I don't know where I stand on this argument, I see both sides, I agree with both sides, I guess I just want the remastered games I want and not others, I can understand the appeal of Halo 2 Remastered, the Games completely different,  you can see the huge change its gone through and what you can do with ten years of updated tech, but I find it hard to see the appeal in a Devil May Cry and Dark Souls 2 rehash when the games are both over a year old.

Is it just me or do other people feel this way about certain games and feel the smaller teams and resources used could have been distributed better?

Koi Koi to another ManicallyDepressed-ModeratelyFunny blog

P.s I'm seing Bladerunner at the cinema tonight :O

Caleb

It's only been 2 f*****g weeks!

So this is one long overdue blog thats taken me two weeks to even start writing, I couldn't tell you why I got out of the habit, Ive started to be able read again, my interest in books has gone through the roof, so the time I normally spend in the morning blogging over coffee has turned into a reading hour.

Such a quality read!

Now when I say I've started to be able to read again its not that I forgot 'how' to read its just that my brains been so scrambled I found it incredibly hard to retain anything, I'd read a page and forget a page at the same time. Fucking frustrating to say the least!

But alls well and good in that vain now so Iread through Andrzej Sapkowski's second Witcher novel Time of Contempt, A quality read for anyone who likes a rich fantasy world full of politics, conspiracy, sex, violence and bad language.

My times also being occupied by a few games, My ps4 getting more playtime than ever at the minute,  The free running zombie fest Dying Light and Borderlands The Handsome Collection being my main two go to games!

The story of Dying Light is a sad one, after hours of trying and failing to get into Majora's Mask it met its match in Game for a trade in value of £35. One day i'll revisit it but for now it just wasn't doing it for me. Dying Light being its replacement, hardly a sad tail worthy of shedding a tear over.

Now I don't know if I have ever gone into details about my hobbies and likes, It obviously clear that Video games is my thing, it has been since my Megadrive days. crying at the fact I couldn't get Super Sonic, that bastard was bright yellow!

I really did cry.

I'm your typical geek, I have little to no friends, I'm becoming more overweight as the days go by, I read comics and have a love affair for anything Ed Brubaker writes, 'Sleeper' being my favourite comic I've ever read.

I love Music, I have a moderate collection of Vinyls I've collected over the last year or so.

Some of my favourite albums and also classics like Led Zeppelin III and Jimi Hendrix's Are you Experienced.

My blu ray or as I call them Uh Blay collection is now 150 strong, I try and visit the cinema as much as I can in my spare time.

Mount your Friends! Its fun.

Todays post comes in the form of another video.

We had a quick game of Mount your friends and this was the end result, an amazing game for 0.59p.

As silly as it may look its a very intense and hard to master game.
Incredibly competitive with hilarious dick swinging mechanics its a joy to play and watch.

I hope you enjoy the content that I'm creating.

sorry about the sporadic times Im posting content, I keep on deciding to sleep all day, resulting in late posts, I think I may have annoyed what small following of people I had reading as My read rate has dropped by like 70 percent recently, I don't know why?

Anyway back to the YouTube video, Enjoy.

Manic Army

Caleb, ManicallyDepressed-ModeratelyFunny.


Please subscribe and like as it means the world.
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCllx1-z8fVljqoOqJ41iw-Q

Gunman Clive Part 4

I see how annoying that could be now.

STAGE 11

Dick just threw a bottle at me!

Not an actual dick, just this dick cowboy.

I celebrate by catching the bottle and jumping into the abyss, popping the cork in tandem like I'm part of the champagne circus. (35)

Dick just got me again! Again the cowboy, not a dick.

Swinging platforms 'Tarzan' me too safety, away from the PeliCANS and PeliCANTS

These damn Tarzan swinging platforms cause me problems as I fall to my death again, Are these holes just never ending? Are they dug to the centre of the earth?! One weird layed out country if you ask me! (36)

Tarzan, Professional Swinger.

I kill him this time, Learning.

Jumping into the air when a platforms moving. Not learning!

Stupid fucking peliCAN (38) (39) 

I don't wait, I miss time this Tarzan swing, I die once a fucking gain! (40) (41) (42) (43)

Its that PeliCANT that won't let me pass, like some flying feathered Gandalf.

Turns out that bastard last jump was the end of the level, 74 seconds of swinging jumps, I let my anger recede like the ocean and move on to      
stage 12.

Bouncy mushroom or mushroom trip? Ask Clive.

STAGE 12

Is that a bouncy mushroom? That's a bouncy fucking mushroom.

Standard cowboy mushroom, I think Clive's eaten one to many mushrooms today, that would be an interesting turn of events if it was all a mushroom induced trip.

I mushroom bounce into that familiar abyss once fucking more! (44) (45) 

The jump mechanic of this mushroom is actually that stressful I want to stop playing (46)

This can only get worse as I imagine half the level will be awful mushroom jumps. (47)

I do it, only to be denied by a  peliCANT (48) Its okay now, I've figured out the awful mushroom jump mechanic.

Army Ducks. Adorable, Deadly.

Now ducks are flying in back up troops, adorable, but now it adds another layer to the fight, land and air combat, I'm not ready for this!

What did I say, mushroom jumps, God damn. FUCK! I curl my toes in absolute fucking anger.

156 seconds. Thank fuck for that that.

UNLUCKY STAGE 13

I jump onto a platform, a platform that tilts all the way to the left and dumps me into the cold abyss (49) Lets try sprint across it next time.

You rock! rock pun.

Nope. (50)

Looks like I can make it across if I jump it, I successfully jump through but lose two bars of health against some bullet sprinkler.

Hello sprinkler and rock monster, how are you today?

I roll across a gap onto the back of a giant platform and into the final section of stage 13, 1 bar of health left, I'm ready to die.

I have to run on a giant boulder like some kind of Flintstone, I do this as eloquently as a brick (51)
through a glass window, running straight off the boulder and into some spikes below

I'm over this level right now, I just want it to end!

I cruise through with some serious pace, next challenge is a spinning ledge, jumping from one side to the next as it lifts me higher in the air and onto the next platform, I slide down it like a fireman's pole and die once again

(52) (53) (54) (55) (56) (57) (58) (59)

Once may have been an understatement.

When I say I die this much I genuinely mean it, I can't fucking do this today!

(60) (61) (62) (63) (64) (65)

I'm over it today, I choose to put the 3DS down instead of leaving it under a car tyre. fucking Clive.

Manic Army

Caleb ManicallyDepressed-ModeratelyFunny.

<----------- Check my new YouTube Content

Follow my Twitter - https://twitter.com/WinslowBateman

This week in words, YouTube.

After last weeks less than stellar content turn around I went on a busy spree recording videos .

So i have what I think maybe two or three new videos depending on how good the last 50 minutes of content is.

So this week I shall be dropping some more video content than ever plus more of Gunman Clive's adventures.

Probably more Bipolar medical updates, content was short last week from me having the flu and then going into a very horrible depressive stage where I didn't wash for two weeks, wasn't eating and slept for three whole days. not fun for anyone!

Sorry if I'm abit to honest about my illness but its always been part of my blog, ever since I started writing these small crayon scribblings, so I like to keep the continuity up.


So please kick back and enjoy my content, please like and subscribe, share between friends and family and make a depressed soul happy.

The thought of making people laugh is what keeps me going.

I think thats everything.

Stay till the end!

Manic Army,

Caleb, ManicallyDepressed-Moderately Funny.

Youtube Channel-
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCllx1-z8fVljqoOqJ41iw-Q

Never fear The Order 1886 is here.

My red velvet curtains.

Hello, long time no Blog!

Just spent the best part of a week or two getting over super flu!

Probably the sickest I've been in years in all honesty, it was rubbish. No games were played, no Blogs were written, nothing was done apart from sleeping and trying to sleep, but NEVER fear I'm feeling a little better, so today I write from a moderately tidy room with the curtains open and its not even 8 am.

I must be sick.

Ive been on a mad downward spiral recently and been in and out of doctors and hospitals having heart scans and blood tests to make sure my body can handle the new mood stabilisers i'll be put on soon.

So that's been my week in and out of doctors and hospitals, having meetings and scans, blood tests and speaking to people about my illness, its been pretty shitty being forced to relive all those horrible moments and explain them for the 100th time when all I want to do is move past it.

People draw super saiyan lycan beasts.

I did manage to grab a copy of The Order 1886, I'm enjoying my play through so far, I managed chapter 1-10 in my first sitting before I succumbed to the need for sleep. and my PS4 kept switching off. True Story.

Knowing the game is only 16 chapters long has stopped me from playing it since, as I don't want it to end, once its done the game becomes redundant, no multiplayer, no 'Lycan' mode, just a quick run through to clean up on the last few trophies and then back to Games shelf.

Sad life cycle but the only one it will get, I can imagine by this weekend Game and CEX will be mostly built up of second hand copies of a game every bodies finished, I would mostly be building forts out of all my copies if I could.

Touch my Moustache, no joke. FUCKING TOUCH IT.

Then there's the bundles that will no doubt appear left right and centre trying to sell the game some more to make up for its incredibly average Metacritic score of 65. not that Metacritic should matter, make your own minds up!

Making the game an Amber.

luckily for the guys and gals at Ready At Dawn the game is the most incredible thing my eyes have ever seen on a screen, multiple times I've stopped watching a cut scene and stood for overly long periods of time before I realise the game is in fact in motion.

This and my hunger for moustached characters Im very happy with what I've played so far, I know my journeys about to end but hopefully they do an Assassins Creed 2 and make a sequel thats one of the best titles released on the last generation console.

His blade is taking his spine for a ride.

Hopefully i can find my missing notebook of ideas and drafts and be back on the blog hype as of next week, sorry again for illness but I've been so depressed and out of it I nearly quit my job and become a farmer, true story.

Manic Army

Caleb -ManicallyDepressed-ModeratelyFunny.

Twitter-
https://twitter.com/WinslowBateman

Apotheon Review - Nappy Edition

APOTHEON

Truth be told I've been in a Zelda trance these last few days.

Fiery beginnings.

This ended when I got tired of dying on the final boss of A Link Between Worlds.

So today I switch on my ps4 kick back with a coffee and decide it's go time for Alientrap games Inc's APOTHEON this months free PS Plus game, which looks like it should be painted on the side of a pot.

Greek style.

The main gist of the story is you've been abandoned by the Gods, and shits gone bad, people are pillaging and destroying buildings.

My adventure starts as I wake up after a brief lay down on the floor and everything is on fire, Raiders pillaging the burning shells of houses, its now my job to help out the villagers.

My name is Nikandreos and I'm a helpaholic!

What a shell house might look like.

My basic controls involve X for the ability to jump.

I can pick up items with the Square.

Roll away from danger with the O.

I can drink potions to heal myself with ∆.

I intimidate my foes by punching in their general direction with the R2

I throw stuff at peoples head when you tap R1

I wield the power of my giant shield with L2

and can change my shield for a torch with L1

<----> on the D pad move between your weapons, potions and throwable objects.

Like he said he's a helpaholic with simple controls to help you along the way.

The game is mostly built up of oranges, reds, blacks and yellows again keeping in with the greek aesthetic and feels a lot like Guacamelee in Olympus, Your typical bad character wears a red nappy and your friends wear blue nappies, everything is set up in a neat and tidy manor.

Have a Guacamelee good time.

Its very smooth and quick to use, I love the way it doesn't clutter up your screen with over complicated customisation options making it easier to calculate an attacking or defensive play

Theres a lot of choice of combination of weapons and armour you unlock as you play through the game, slowly pimping your character as you work your way through tasks, feeling like a hack and slasher at first the game offers more than meets the eye the further you progress into the story

Sure it was.

The game has a beautiful art design, fun interactive world and a story involving Greek Gods, Sign me the fuck up.

I decide that every pot needs to die as I get Greek 'Link' on there ass smashing everything in sight

The first set of missions revolve around you helping the distressed villagers, Once you save the Apothecary he shows you how to craft items, handy.

At the Blacksmiths house you acquire a shield and leather armour, basic but its a start.

I then decide its time to scare the hunters as I destroy everything in there hideout, they take the time to teach you how to throw objects ranging from javelins to bows, knives and greek Molotov's. Fiery

Next the granary for a nice fresh cut loaf, Thats a lie, I have to stop them from taking all the grain as supplies are short and demand is high. This is a simple task for a helpful nappy wearing murder machine.

He then takes an arrow to the knee.

Last but not least I need to rescue some prisoners, I'm taking it that these are freshly captured villagers and not rapists and murders or they can just stay there and rot.

After saving the day and completing all the objectives its time to mess up there leader lovingly named Ophion the tyrant, I decide the best thing to do is cleave him in two with my big shiny axe.

Now thanks to my axe happy chopping arm I'm declared the modestly named 'Chosen Champion'

As I stand before Hera, Zeus's wife, she turns me into an absolute boss, informing me that Zeus is being a little bitch and screwed everyone over like a child throwing his toys out the pram, Its now my job to strip all Gods of there power, Zeus included and ascend to the next level of Badass. offering salvation to my people along the way!

Its not as easy as I first thought, Zeus runs such a tight shift, if you 'Link' any of the surrounding smash able objects guards demand you pay Zeus or die, a lot like Skyrim.

Time to turn Zeus into my little bitch I think

Manic Army

Caleb.

Online Diary, Day 1 - Bipolar Zelda.

Sorry if I got anyone's hopes up with that title I posted last week, whilst I was on the speculation train I thought it only fair to stop off at platform 3 and a Half-Life.

Ready to save the day, one crowbar at a time.

As long as people use Steam it's safe to say Half life 3 is a long way away.

It would be a nice thing to hear though wouldn't it, enough photo shop jobs on the Internet to make you think otherwise, My personal favourite being the 'Gabe' Half Life 3 image I used in that blog.

Talking of Steam I saw Tomb Raider for £2.99, absolute madness if you ask me!

Jumped aboard the Zelda train this morning, Spirit train for all you technical nerds out there, and brought a copy of Majora's Mask 3D, I then spent the whole day playing A Link Between Worlds. How odd?!

Only 2 of the seven sages left to collect, so its been a fun filled, dungeon questing day.

That adorable train!

I feel like I haven't released any proper content in a while even though I just edited content drop mark II 'I think I'm going to Spelunk"

Originally 45 minutes long I cut nearly 2/3 away to keep it in the 15 minute time frame YouTube allows.

Hopefully you'll be able to see the effort that went into making this one.

A different experience from the first video, but I hope you enjoy it all the same.

Not sure what the next video will be of and when it'll be recorded but hopefully it'll happen in the next week or two as Matt's one busy bee, I could always try being funny alone but that's just a scary thought.

Its not that scary.

Matt's also my partner in crime when it comes to creating content!

Has this become an online diary for me at the minute as I've lost any sort of direction I once had, I think it has a little, do I just stop 2 months into this project?

FUCK NO.

Documenting the mind of a Bipolar gamer and all the content he tries to create was always the idea of this blog, To do it for me, to prove I can do things no matter how scary they may seem.

My biggest anxiety actually coming from people knowing its me, Its amazing how your views can change in such a short period of time.

Now I want people to know it's me.

Create content! If not for others then for yourselves, it's rewarding to see what you can create from nothing.

I also got my Diagnosis back today from the doctor so I have an official piece of paper saying I have Bipolar disorder, its sad and scary to read about spots of amnesia and memory lapses I suffered from being so far down the rabbit hole.

Next step is treatment so after some blood tests and heart scans they will be able to move me over from an anti psychotic to a mood stabiliser, either Lithium or Valproate.

Hears to the next big step in this crazy new year.




Oh and here's what we created!

Subscribe to the YouTube -
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Manic Army

Caleb - ManicallyDepressed-ModeratelyFunny

I think I'm going to Spelunk!

Happy Friday 13th!

I managed to edit it together and this is the end result, 13 minutes of awful spelunking!

I hope you enjoy, please subscribe and leave comments and come back for more ManicallyDepressed - ModeratelyFunny adventures!

Manic Army

Caleb

Spelunky's a bitch

So apparently confirming Half Life 3 is a death wish  on the Internet as its wanted so bad.

I doubt it will ever come out as it honestly doesn't need to, Valve makes so much money with steam its silly to release any game at the minute, they may as well save it till steams on the down and pump some life back into the stocks with the ultimate box collection 3, Half Life 3, Team Fortress 3 and Portal 3, like the orange box with numbers or add Left 4 Dead 3 to confirm more 3s.

Today's post is short and spontaneous, just how I like my woman, saying that I'm 6.4 so most people are short compared to me.

The reason why its so short is I'm currently editing some video that we shot last night, I'm trying to turn it into something for tomorrow/Monday, seems as I'm fairly new to the editing world its taking a while!

I did however finish Life is Strange yesterday, as well as shoot 45 minutes of video, so cutting that down to ten minutes Is how I'm spending my Thursday.

Spelunky's a bitch

Manic Army

Caleb.

Half Life 3 CONFIRMED.

Its really hard to keep motivated when you feel like no ones reading your blog.

I automatically assume 1 million people will read it every day in the space of my first month and dismiss myself as useless from the go.

I'll just fail forever.

This being a curse as my mood can plummet in a few hours, everything takes time to grow and I hope the people that are reading really do enjoy my ramblings, remember to like and comment and follow my google plus account and other forms of social media so I can keep unto date on what to write about.

The more outlets I post on, the more I realise you pay to advertise a lot of the time, I know you pay to advertise but my god they really do just want your money, so word of mouth it is.

So its hard to not get a little bummed out on a daily basis when you have nothing better to do than stalk your own page.

This week I shot my very first YouTube video which was amazing fun, also learning to edit as I went along was an interesting task but I feel like it wasn't completely awful.

Hoping to shoot some more today in the same vain, playing classic games on the Gamecube or Wii  and filming as we go along, should be fun and hopefully you will see some progression as we record more.

Matt's a super fun bro and a very close friend, an amazing photographer as well so check out his Twitter page https://twitter.com/PhotogMT

Tall and Small seems like a suitable title for our grand YouTube adventure, so please someone be my first sub and comment on what you think and what could be done better.

I want to make something funny and unique and so far its two friends playing old games having a giggle so your feedback really does matter to me.

I brought some PS4 bargains this week as well, first up is Square Enix's time travel friendly Life is Strange and indie title Lone Survivor for a combined £6.00 instead of £14 so look out for those offers this week, always looking to improve my library with content as I'm an indie game lover.

Happy Caleb.

Just make it already.

The pile is now back on track and slowly growing more and more, my ability to finish them becoming less and less as my time now has to be divided into working as well, so I'm going to spend most of this morning playing Life is Strange because guess what?

Life is in fact very strange.

Also is anyone else hype at the fact Bethesda are at E3 this year?

The Evil Within 4 confirmed, Dishonoured 4 confirmed, Fallout 4 confirmed. Skyrim 4 confirmed , Half Life 3 confirmed, why Half Life?

Because its the internet and some one will take that seriously.

Manic Army!

Caleb

Exercise my right to pick up a gun and fight - Gunman Clive part 2

Today I'm Celebrate America by watching the Super Bowl, I'm betting the Patriots will win for some weird reason, whats more patriotic than having patriot in you name?

Rugby for wimps?

Anyway I decide in my pure chill state to fire up some Gunman Clive in what I'm describing as 'Let's Play meets walk through that adds no help at all, just details of death via cute animal'

Let's do this.

Stage 6 - 19 Retries - 16 Minutes play time.

A pelican hangs around in the air later deciding to shit a bird bomb at me, feeling one with the controls I jump shot him, jumping a cliff in the process and taking out two cowboys exercising my truly bad ass gunman skills.

A saw stares me out, daring me to make the jump, I think nothing of the stupid task only to get rushed by a man on horse back straight away. I worriedly shoot  all over the screen waiting for him to make a second pass, I don't look so good now.

What gap?

I focus so much on this shooting this passing arsehole I completely miss the hole in bridge falling to death number (20) 

I start of with a far more aggressive play style this time and figure it takes between 3 and 6 hits to kill this horsemen, I  smash all four this time with out taking one hit, beast mode engaged.

Bye Bye bridge of death, hello freshly blown holes in the next bridge.

I shoot a large red barrel, blowing what I can only assume are the pieces that are meant to fly away up, I can almost taste stage 7.

Two more terrifying bridges later and multiple explosions I roll through stage 6 in 59 seconds, that's a lie, more pre judged excitement when in fact I'm greeted by two more horsemen.

I jump down a ladder and that's stage 7 in 77 seconds.

Oh fuck it I need to stop guessing and wait until I finally actually do I, Oh I do now, 80 seconds in.

Stage 7

Creepy? Fuck no.

I start this part of my adventure in an abandoned mine shaft, jumping in the only thing I can see,
I wonder if I'll spend my whole time in this mine cart?

Looks like a yes, as I go to jump out the cart as a gap appears, the cart follows me like its welded to my lower cowboy parts, legs that is.

It's almost over as fast as it began, shooting me across a level of pelicans and gunmen in opposing mine carts.

I miss time an awkward short jump and jump straight into the abyss (21) 

Lets tackle that one again shall we!

More high speed chases in mine carts making Battlefield Hardline look like child's play, I high speed my self into the abyss one more time. (22) 

Once this game kills you, it kills you a lot! FUCK IT (23)

Fuck those guys, I fly through the level in 60 seconds flat . ONWARDS!!!

                                                                                    Stage 8

Only work he could get these days.

I climb down a ladder and bitch slap a wolf in the face, I rescale the ladder to notice he's re appeared once again.

I'm more taken by the magic blocks that appear and disappear before my eyes, I wonder what I'm going to have to do with them?

JUMP ACROSS THEM.

They form together into a tedious puzzle, one appears, one is taken away, making you                
                                                                                       memories the order they appear in to get to the       next level.

As I focus on the man in front of me with a gun I lose focus and walk straight into a decent, a decent into spikes, damn times moving blocks! (24)

I manoeuvre the jumps, slap a man in the face a dash over to a tiny killer bat, I finish bats off and jump over some more spike floor finishing another bat and gunman, I'm getting good at this now, I miss judge the jump and eat spike salad once again, No more!

That's a wrap.

Manic Army

Caleb.

Dollar Bills and Explosions - Battlefield Hardline Beta - C4 Edition

Its not the start of a blog and beta run if I don't have some form of caffeine, normally a black coffee to get the brain firing on all cylinders.

'BETA'LLEFIELD.

Sitting in a dark room like a vampire, trying to remember the last time I opened my curtains, I'd say mid October.

So greetings people, this is my first sit down with the Battlefield Hardline Beta, I'm quickly reminded of the theme of this game as a quick edit and flash montage is burnt into the back of my mind with dollars, watches, c4 explosions and fire all flashing before me in a quick 20 second burst of 'look at me'

This subsequently turns into a good cop or a bad robber? who knows?! I can see cops in his glasses so I'm going to say bad robber.

The first thing I notice is that they've put a LINE through HARDLINE, clever Visceral games, but that doesn't blow my socks off like the Facebook integration, no Battlefield you can't black mail me into advertising your game to my friend in return for an In game battle-pack, not yet anyway.

First things first and most importantly I need a Badman patch to show I'm representing the U.K, I soon start laughing at a patch of 3 legs running in a circle. This amuses me and enlightens me that this is in fact the flag for the Isle of man, nothing manlier than 3 armour clad legs rolling along.

Its a real flag, Honest.

I look to customise my load-out, looks like I need 2 years wages to buy an AKS-74U, no wonder their robbing banks.

In total there are 3 match types.

Firstly we have Heist, the aim here is to rob a vault, escaping via helicopter get away, unless your lucky enough to be a respawning police officer, then your job is to prevent the escape.

Secondly we have Hotwire, this one sounds fun! Find and capture vehicles stashed around the level, drive the vehicles at high speed to deplete the enemies tickets.

Last but not least we have the classic Conquest mode, a staple part of the Battlefield franchise this high intensity game of 'control the points of interest' is my personal favourite.

I want to be a robber with a shotgun, If payroll permits it that is.

It kicks me straight into a match, it explains how to select a class and what roles it offers to the player.

100K back pack.

OPERATOR: Assault Rifle, First Aid Kit.
MECHANIC: SMG, Grenade Launcher.
ENFORCER: Shotgun, Ammo Crate.
PROFESSIONAL: Sniper Rifle, Tripmine.

First match and I choose the operator, gotta love me them heal points.

Turns out my wish doesn't come true and I'm a copper

The first thing I notice about Hardline is the serious change of pace this game offers compared to other games in the franchise, on a more positive note I stop the bag carrier dead with a head shot only to get blown away by a shotgun blast to the face seconds later.

There still seems to be the same problem most FPS suffers from and thats spawn camping scumbags with shotguns.

The first match I play is Heist, the lay out of this map can quickly change your style of gameplay, be it the tight claustrophobic corridors of the vault chamber, stalked by teams of shotgun toting maniacs or the open streets, sprawled with roof top snipers and full frontal assaults this mode offers multiple play styles to be quickly adopted on the fly upon death.

Do it now!

Every soldier has seen Predator as their screaming 'Get to the choppa'.

I adopt my new play style as the match is taking into the open streets, I swap to a ENFORCER class dropping ammo down for the long defence of the loot, this slows down gameplay a lot as swarms of robbers assault trying to re capture the duffle bag full of money.

This takes us to an easy win, dropping the bag in a large open area can bring the end of a match round very fast if defended well, chewing through tickets as they throw lives away for the greater good.

Hotwire on the other hand is completely different, that much so it doesn't even fell like the same game and more like a first person game of Burnout Paradise as I tear it round the streets at high speed in my sedan.

It sounded amazing when I read it but I spend 15 minutes driving around a map mowing people down till I finally die, my thought of high speed car chases being pursued by a car full of pressing cops trying to blow out my tires, money spilling out of open windows as my clan of robbers fire back never comes to fruition.

Hotwire mode? I think not.

Instead I drive around in slow circles performing three point turns where I can, the only excitement coming from an oncoming gas tanker firing past me, but instead of exploding and my car flipping down the streets I'm left driving down the street, slightly of track I might say.

The match ends quickly as the opposing team never manages to capture a checkpoint.

I tire of this game type rather fast, one benefit is the easy 2000 points my sedan gain's from a lovely Sunday drive around a sandy park.

That sniper.

I tackle the Large Conquest mode head on and call in the help of brother dearest, we join a party, fire up a squad and launch straight into a match no problem.

This is your standard defend and assault mode but its mostly just a snipe fest, certain weapons seem slightly overpowered compared to others.

when I'm out gunned by AK74U from a distance I call bullshit.

Some cool additions are added rewarding players spawning on there squad with extra cash, this being your main currency for buying upgrades and new weapons, Also the game starts to flex it's technical muscle by throwing in a very 'American Sniper' sand storm into the mix only this looks more realistic and fun than that of Bradley Coppers outing.

We bro it out for 3 match's and three wins.

Manic Army!

Caleb

Be sure to check out my first YouTube video -  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EcUM-hIYtAE


Follow the Twitter - https://twitter.com/WinslowBateman

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YouTube Content, A recipe for disaster Mark II.

My Second attempt at YouTube content should be uploaded today.

Do people follow using Google +?

Hopefully people will enjoy what me and my friend Matt created

The quality of this video is through the roof compared to our first shoddy outing, stick with it! This ones better!

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Please feel free to comment on the blogs as well, criticism welcome!

Manic Army

Caleb, ManicallyDepressed - ModeratelyFunny!

Future Proof, Fame not included.

A strange week for me this week, 

Future proof, fame not included.

Firstly I was diagnosed as Bipolar which is a huge relief and a long time coming, but to finally hear those words is the best thing that could happen as now I can be treated accordingly, which means more blood tests and heart scans!

I love blood tests so fucking much it's untrue.

Then to celebrate the diagnosis I brought an Elgato HD60 to start streaming some gameplay, I then realised my laptop couldn't handle the power of full 1080p 60fps streaming and recording, I then made a decision based on it being a success.

Like any reasonably sound of mind person would do, I brought a MacBook Pro.

Normal people wouldn't do this but I think its part of my charm.

So now every blog is delivered from a laptop I'm still not sure how to use, so badly so I had to text a friend, from MacBook to MacBook I should say,  about how to hashtag. #TrueStory

Dollar bills and explosions.

My week has mostly been filled with downloading Beta's

Battlefield Hardline was the first beta, my normal blog should be up in the next few days showing my 1337 skill set, If everything goes well I could technically record gameplay of the beta and narrate my blog over the top of it, like a white Morgan Freeman.

Secondly I emailed the Neverwinter devs about getting a place in the closed beta, a Xbox One MMORPG based around the dungeons and dragons franchise.

Greek battles never looked so good.

I was lucky enough to get a place so I'm intrigued and excited to see whats to offer.

So normally I have a list of games I've finished, after the last few weeks I've finished close to 10 games so its strange to not finish one at all, The list is starting to grow as I add Saints Row IV and Apotheon, a free Playstation Plus game for ps4 users!

Transistor and Rogue Legacy are the two amazing games free with Playstation Plus this month, Transistor is a science fiction RPG that follows the story of voiceless singer Red as she travels through a beautifully handprinted world fighting an enemy known as the process, My personal game of 2014 and Rogue Legacy an indie platform game, the goal is to explore a randomly generated castle, defeat four bosses in four unique environments and then defeat the final boss.

Jen Zee's amazing digital art.

I finally finished my adventure after 27 hours. 

So from me to anyone reading this that hasn't played either they are a must own for any growing Playstation Library.

Once upon a time I contacted the artist for Transistor wishing to buy some of Jen Zee's amazing art only to have my heart broken when she told me it was all done digitally and there wasn't a original copy, I was then told to check out the supergiant games store and buy some one of the posters and having it never work for me.

I still mourn to this day, another true story.

Lets hope the next week brings more finished games.

Never one to force the very natural work flow I've adopted hopefully some video content will start to be uploaded in the next few weeks.

Enjoy your Friday and download those games!

Koi Koi

Caleb

Follow the mindless tweets of a troubled individual at 
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