The glorious return of someone that isn't very interesting. Seriously.

So where to start, well it's been a year. yup, a whole year since I lost what little mind I had, the most logical thing I could think to do was to try and pull my arms off and all my hair. Safe to say I eat medication for breakfast and dinner now, I rattle more than a maraca but my mind is in the right place so that's what matters more than anything.

I decided to start this up again, Its been a fun adventure over the past year, I've tried lots of different forms of being creative in the gaming space.

I chronicled my adventures whilst playing Shovel Knight and got some kind words and responses from the developers that worked on the game which was amazing. ( I've currently brought the game on every platform it's been released on. Wii U, 3dsxl and PS4/Vita)

I started reviewing games for a company called The Nerd Stash for a few months, my focus shifting more to reviews and news.

Lastly Twitch became a new outlet for me, Taking to it so much I couldn't juggle writing and streaming.

Plus now I have a part time job as a postman.

The benefit of the job is that I only work 5 hours a day, meaning I can sleep when I get home and stream in the afternoons. Work took more of the focus over the christmas months as we where very busy, but now with the new year ago go and things starting to get quieter I thought, why not?

So why the fuck not.

This was an outlet when I felt I'd lost everything, giving me a reason to wake up in the morning and be productive. Avenues where opened, coming full circle a year later and trying to mix all 3 together.

So I've decided to blog reviews and updates as well as streaming my favourite new and current titles.

My Twitch is  http://www.twitch.tv/fi5h5tick5/profile

I'm juggling between Bloodborne, Final Fantasy VII, Dark Souls II and some other titles I fancy.

Keeping it short and sweet like mmmmmmmmmmmmm Kirby.

Love Love

Caleb, FI5H5TICK5, Senpai Fi5h, ManicallyDepressed-ModeratleyFunny and all the other personas I currently have.

The sites down and so's my creative streak

So The Nerd Stash is currently swapping hosts for the website which means I get some down time from all fun of writing news articles and seeing whats going on in the world on a daily basis, so I came back to old trusty Blogspot.

I probably need to keep more up to date with this but I get lost and find it hard to find the time especially when reviewing games as it takes a lot of time, patience and concentration to complete them in one to two sittings and all of those things aren't my strong point.

Lifeless Planet was so boring I nearly ended my own life, but then that might be the message the developer was going for so I thought I'd just slightly crucify it in my review, nothing to harsh, I believe I said it was 'The worst game I'd ever played'

So my two hour creative window and coffee break has gone to updating the world about the woes of being a ManicallyDepressed-ModeratelyFunny writer and reviewer with nothing to write and no new games to play apart from my ever growing catalogue of titles I'm playing for my own pleasure.

Currently playing a lot of Battlefield: Hardline, me and my brother are a squad to be reckoned with when we get into the groove and with a wicked single player campaign I look forward to finishing it again on Hardline mode as veterans the highest you can start it on, what a shame! I think once you've ranked up your expert level to the max and re try the levels again they should be easier as you have more fire power to play with as taking on the world with a shotgun always ends badly.

Me and my partner in crime the lovely Sarah Jane are slowly working our way through The Halo Master Chief Collection, 9 levels into Halo 2 and I still can't get my head round how beautiful that game looks!

Thinking about making some lets plays with her as we shout at each other a lot, she also like to tell me off for exploring the map, or 'running away' as she likes to call it, apparently I'm a terrible coop partner, Me and Matt never had that problem.

I finished my fourth play through of Bastion, another game that's possibly one of my favourites ever with Transistor, anything SuperGiant Games do is gold in my eyes!

Yoshi's Woolly World is currently taking my brain by storm at the moment as I want it more than words can describe, even more so than Batman: Arkham Knight and that's saying something. Woolly yarn Yoshi, to adorable for words to describe, a Let's Play must in my eyes!

This has been in the back of my mind ever since EGX last year

I have EGX to look forward to this year as well and hopefully after this years E3 there will be a lot of new games to play, I'm most excited to get my hands on StarWars Battlefront as Dice make a quality shooter, as long as it works better than Battlefield 4 did over its launch period, I had such a bad time with it I traded it in for something I've probably traded in or forgotten about now.

As life's concerned I'm still fucking lost. It's my birthday in like 4 weeks and the thought of being 26 and still as hopeless as I was when I was 18 and fresh out of school kills me, as I slowly move forward in my life something new comes along and fucks it up, finally a names been put to the illness but I still worry that every day is my last sane one as my brain ticks along like a time bomb.

Do people still read these or do I write them for myself? I think I kind of just write them to put my thoughts into words and get rid of them, if people read them then thats cool, if they don't then thats cool. The blog lead on to the next chapter and lets hope that next chapter leads to bigger challenges.

Koi Koi

ManicallyDepressed-ModeratelyFunny

Caleb

Today I thought of you.

So I've been hugely busy over the past few weeks, I've been an usher at my best friends wedding, I've travelled Novigrad, Velen and Skellige and write a lot of news articles and reviews for the Nerd Stash.

Everything seems to be going in the right direction for me at the minute and then I thought of you.
'You' being the blog, Its easy to neglect and forget about when your putting so much time and effort into your passion, I'm eternally grateful to Jeremy for giving me this opportunity and I loving every minute I spend in this little gaming hub, and free games!

I love free games.

So in true 'Ive left my blog for two weeks or longer fashion' I decided to write another one updating the world with this online diary I've taken to writing.

What started the neglect was The Witcher 3: The Wild Hunt, I always new the time would come where I switched off from real life and turn Geralts story into my own. In true RPG nerd fashion that happened and its all I wanted to do for two weeks, then work got in the way and I reviewed one good game and one bad game, The bad game being a mobile port of 'Badland' it just seemed like a huge cash in to me, trying to make a quick buck by taking its mobile success and applying it to the console world, more original Xbox than Xbox One material.

The good being a weird and whacky game called 'Schrodingers Cat and The Raiders of The Lost Quark' A truly unique mechanic making this a true stand out!

Quarks are adorable also! End of.

If you haven't check out the website please do, we have multiple social media pages set up and the team works really hard to try and bring all the happening news to the readers in the own unique fashion. Creative freedom being key, if you want to write it then do it, and with the run up to E3 being four days away the excitement and nerves are running high to try and make our first expo a success.

New YouTube content has been created with affiliated sites offering sign up discounts on first purchases, we had our first Twitch stream of Hearthstone as well which was a success, also looking at creating some new content for our YouTube channel myself after practising with my few videos, so hopefully that will take off more as time goesby and Podcasts are the works, making us a fully fledged member of the gaming journalism world.

On the BiPolar side of things stuff is starting to look up for once, my medication has been altered once again and slowly but surely I'm getting back to my old self minus any sort of confidence, No longer does Risperidon rain havoc on my morning route making me one squishy faced tired sleepy head and with my Venlafaxine being upped I'm a lot more chirpier than normal, give it two more months and I'll be off Risperidone completely and it'll just be Venlafaxine and Sodium Valproate.

I'm starting to look at my diagnosis as a huge blessing in surprise, going from a hollow shell of a man with the idea and desire to write but no drive to do it and I've gone from starting a blog to working at a new company bring news and reviews to the masses, I'm completely overwhelmed by the experience especially when you have publishers and developers thanking you for the great review and quoting you in the tweet.

This quote being ' Final thoughts, I want a purple cat now' as Schrodingers Cat was a game that would have gone completely under my radar , I'm so happy it didn't though as I had a huge amount of fun with that game as well as a swift 850 gamer score to add to my now 88500 plus gamer score.

Ive neglected my Xbox One recently and playing the Smite Beta and others has made me re kindle my passion for gamer score, I might love my PS4 more but nothing will beat the gamer score, trophies just don't have the same appeal to me, even though I still try my balls off to get them.

I'm going to look at starting my Gunman Clive play through soon and finish that part of my life and story and start something new.

I'm working on a new Let's play about Donkey Kong at the minute. I Have the content I just need to find the time to edit and do it, hopefully once I start to get abit of structure in my day I can focus on getting my working life and content in check and keep on top of it.

So onwards and upwards, everything changing for the better, its just taking time.
I never thought I would feel like this 3 months ago and 3 months before that I never thought I would feel again.

My adventure is still new but growing every day and I hope you enjoy my little story today.

Also I got a sweet Dragonball tattoo on my fore arm with Kid Goku flying Nimbus around the 2 and 6 star Dragonball signifying the day I was born on, meaningful and all that jazz.

Koi Koi

Caleb ManicallyDepressed-ModeratelyFunny.

Wolfenstein: The Old Blood Review

Sorry about the silence on the blog from I entered self inflicted exile to play and review Wolfenstein: The Old Blood for the nerd stash and it took a lot longer than I thought it would getting use to there style and keeping my review up to scratch unlike my normal comical overviews of my experience with the game, so please take the time to look at the website, everyone works really hard to try and keep up to date with all the news and keeping up to date with all the happenings in the world of nerds!

So come take a look http://thenerdstash.com/wolfenstein-old-blood-review/

I hope you enjoy everything that we are trying to bring to the table and I'm excited to move forward with this new adventure, even if the american time zones are fucking up my sleeping patterns! damn being 6 hours in the future.

Koi Koi

Caleb ManicallyDepressed-ModeratelyFunny

The start of something new #Thenerdstash

Don't be put off by the title, I'm not stopping the blog at all. I've recently been trying to progress my portfolio, hopefully over the next couple of days I'll be able to share my new experience with you as I should be doing some freelance writing for a cool new website called www.thenerdstash.com An American based haven for all things games, technology and nerd, as it says in the title.

Check back soon.

I recently was in talks with there editor in chief Jeremy Harris and I'm excited to say that I should be starting pretty soon, so look out for my new posts on their website aswell as updated blog posts from ManicallyDepressed-ModeratelyFunny

Some things that I've got to work on is probably my potty mouth, grammar and punctuation, basic understanding of the English language would probably go down quiet well also.

So things are looking on the up for me at the minute. Not only is bipolar life starting to get better with new adventures starting everyday hopefully over the next month all my medication should be sorted out after 6 months and I'll be on the up and up.

So there's another small update of things going down in my little bubble.

I look forward to sharing another chapter of my strange little life with everyone.

Koi Koi

Caleb - ManicallyDepressed-ModeratleyFunny.

Coffee and Cigarettes

I currently have a very casual approach to life, I sleep between 12 and 18 hours a day.

What can I say, I love coffee and Cigarettes.

I take my medication when I'm suppose too, I chain smoke cigarettes and drinking black coffee like some cop from L.A.Noire.

I think about what I want from my life, I contemplate education, maybe something to do with writing? Creative perhaps? Journalistic, answering questions with questions,  never quiet getting round to answering them.


I'm unsure of so much.

Lego Batman takes some of the stress away. until I realise I need a million studs to unlock the x2 red brick and Ive just spent all my studs buying all the characters I can.

That's first world problems right there.

My problem is I'm trying to start so much, but Im never get around to finishing anything any more.

True story.

I started this blog, I'm certainly not ready to finish it. but what I am unsure of is where to go with it?!

I guess that's life. we all start it with the intention of it never ending, then it does. Be it a long time or a short time. You want to try and change as much as you can in that period of time you spend alive.

I'm certainly spending my days trying to change things, myself mainly.

This blog was a saviour, a blessing in disguise, an out for a very ill person to try get his thoughts into order. Now their in order I struggle to find them.

I run at a constant level of 'normal' and that bores me, never up, yet always down.

I find it hard to do the things I love so much, my passion somewhere else, hidden with that order.

Gone are the days I used to wake and write, gone are the days where my Mac was constantly on charge, gone are the days of my 3DS and Shovel Knight.

I need to try and change it all.

The location of said x2 stud counter.

This leads me to this blog, I kind of just picked my Mac up and started typing away. Unsure of what would happen, Time happens and over time ill people become better be it for the better or worse. That sounds horrible, normally for better, I just feel worse.

So today is the day I make an effort to blog again, to write about all those things I love and the things I love to do.

Maybe I will get back in to education and finish something for real

Or maybe ill just spend the day get that stud count up?!

Koi Koi

Caleb.

It's only been 2 f*****g weeks!

So this is one long overdue blog thats taken me two weeks to even start writing, I couldn't tell you why I got out of the habit, Ive started to be able read again, my interest in books has gone through the roof, so the time I normally spend in the morning blogging over coffee has turned into a reading hour.

Such a quality read!

Now when I say I've started to be able to read again its not that I forgot 'how' to read its just that my brains been so scrambled I found it incredibly hard to retain anything, I'd read a page and forget a page at the same time. Fucking frustrating to say the least!

But alls well and good in that vain now so Iread through Andrzej Sapkowski's second Witcher novel Time of Contempt, A quality read for anyone who likes a rich fantasy world full of politics, conspiracy, sex, violence and bad language.

My times also being occupied by a few games, My ps4 getting more playtime than ever at the minute,  The free running zombie fest Dying Light and Borderlands The Handsome Collection being my main two go to games!

The story of Dying Light is a sad one, after hours of trying and failing to get into Majora's Mask it met its match in Game for a trade in value of £35. One day i'll revisit it but for now it just wasn't doing it for me. Dying Light being its replacement, hardly a sad tail worthy of shedding a tear over.

Now I don't know if I have ever gone into details about my hobbies and likes, It obviously clear that Video games is my thing, it has been since my Megadrive days. crying at the fact I couldn't get Super Sonic, that bastard was bright yellow!

I really did cry.

I'm your typical geek, I have little to no friends, I'm becoming more overweight as the days go by, I read comics and have a love affair for anything Ed Brubaker writes, 'Sleeper' being my favourite comic I've ever read.

I love Music, I have a moderate collection of Vinyls I've collected over the last year or so.

Some of my favourite albums and also classics like Led Zeppelin III and Jimi Hendrix's Are you Experienced.

My blu ray or as I call them Uh Blay collection is now 150 strong, I try and visit the cinema as much as I can in my spare time.

How about a nice cup of LiberTea?!

Todays blog update comes in the form of more YouTube content, Its starts of as a quick overview of Helldivers mechanics and core gameplay which then turns into friendly fire deaths and mechs crushing each other in a tight city map.

I should be recording some more content on Sunday swell which should be ready for Tuesday or Monday depending on the amount of material i get, so sit back, grab a coffee and watch an angry person swear at his friend a lot when it gets down to gameplay. I believe the term 'You fucking bellend' gets dropped a lot.

Thank you for your continued support as my blog continues to grow and lose followers.

Manic Army

Caleb. ManicallyDepressed-ModeratelyFunny

I blame torchlight 2.

The main Culprit.

Now Ive realised my content is starting to slow down yet again. Its gone from 7 days a week, to 5 and now between 3 and up, firstly I'm going to blame this on the combined 28 hours I've clocked on Helldivers and Torchlight 2 over this weekend.

The need to power level to level 100 is very real, 20 hours deep and currently sitting with a level 40 berserker I itch to play more.

Secondly Ive just really been struggling through out the bulk of the day to do anything, often choosing to sleep the days away and wake up late afternoon when people are around as I get terribly lonely, Most of my writing used to take place between 8am -12pm so I'm sleeping through the time I used to use to create content.

Ive been thinking about having certain days for certain types of blog,

Mondays to be game related, reviews, My thoughts on something and general discussions on the gaming world at large.

Wednesdays for my continued blogs of lets plays and other content similar to failing at a game I
choose to play.

Fridays for Overviews of the week, what I'm looking forward too, the next big release and also giving me more time in the week to right a better quality of blog.

Better than some slapped together, rushed piece of crap I force myself to publish, which i don't want to do.

Also allowing time for shooting and recording YouTube content and editing it together which also takes some time to do I might add.

This was meant to be fun and slightly informative to the people that read it, sarcastic and moderately funny, weather any of that is true I really don't know but I like to think people smile a little, its also helped me a lot to distract myself through a very troubling and hard period in my life, being diagnosed as bipolar and the struggles that come with finding the right medication and support to help you get back on track has not been a quick fix or easy task, now getting close to my 5th month out of work.

So this blog has saved my life a little recently as its done its job in distracting me a lot as Ive published over 50 blogs in total now which I'm proud of.

So I thought id just explain where I am and if there has been a dip in quality that's why, my enthusiasm still there but sometimes my depression getting in the way and taking the desire to do anything away from me.

I'm really hoping that slowing it down a step gets me back into the swing of things.

Manic Army

Caleb

I wrote this when i was half asleep

If my job was to blog, I would definitely be getting fired at some point soon.

This caption is self explanatory.

I spent the whole day playing Hell divers, via ps4 remote play, using my buddies PSVita as the second controller, another excellent feature for the ever cool PS4.

Now I must admit Hell divers went completely under my radar.

I'm not actually sure how I managed to miss it? but oh man is it fun, a blend of Starship Troopers, ODST and Command and Conquer.

You command one 'Hell diver', you drop into unknown territory to blow up a bug nest, bugs being 10 foot tall super bugs or drop off a black box to a safe point in the jungle, even multiple objectives per level which then leads to a 90 second skirmish at the evacuation point while you wait for your drop ship to come and save the day.

You spend this 90 seconds hoping some big ugly mother doesn't finish you off before you extract.

4 player Coop, Much fun. Many kills. Wow.

Playing solo grows old quite quick as the difficulty is ramped up and the rewards become less relevant to you, this leads me to the SOS call stratagem which you can call I'm at any point in your game, this then prioritises your game and your need for help as up-to 3 other Hell divers can dive in and join the fun, be it three friends or three complete strangers everyone seems keen to help when saving the world is at hand.

Another cool feature is that you control where your drop zone is, be it on top of the objective which is closer to the danger or a small distance away so you can plot your course more strategically avoiding enemy patrols and taking a more stealthier approach.

This game offers something for everyone. Mech suits, or Flame throwers, stun grenades to airstrikes
or even the simple shotgun or SOS call, your unit calls in certain stratagems to level the odds and bring the pain to one of the 3 enemies types in total.

Mech suit Fun.

My current favourite mix being Heavy armour, lazer machine gun and a Mech suit for all out combat with that extra punch, UAV's for bitches why worry where the enemy is when you can just kill everything in sight?

And that's what happened to my Friday blog, It got turned into 5 Hours of Bro fists and Redbull intake.

A day of Gaming for once at a relaxed pace and little to none depressed mood swings, also I brought Torchlight 2 on steam for 2.99, 2.99!!!!!! That's 80% off. boom, wow!

Manic Army

Caleb.

Can the obvious Order 1886 sequel pull an Assassins Creed 2? The Order 1887 anyone?!

So today I finished The Order 1886.

I'm just going to stand and look cool as fuck.

It was one pretty game but I started to get strangely bored of the combat, hell, Id started to get a little tired of everything by the end of my 6-8 hour run through.

I was interested in the Characters, slightly intrigued into the story and what was unfolding around me and then all of sudden I lost it, It had started to feel like walk from pretty A to pretty B and kill swarms of dumb A.I Englishmen whilst crouching behind a chest high wall or pillar, so many fucking pillars.

This mechanic never normally fails me, Gears of War being a prime example, I couldn't get enough of Marcus Fenix and his adventure for steroids. Galahad on the other hand had the difficulty changed from hard to easy on the last few chapters just so I could churn through this crap fest and finish it.

We will hit you Galahad, you shit.

Not my proudest moment, but I wanted that Gold trophy and to see what it was all about. Id grown tired of rooms filling with shotgun toting Englishmen and wanted some form of closure.

Somewhere in the middle it all got a bit much for me and Galahad, when he decided it was rampage time around chapter 9. This is when the game started to get bit muddled up, until that point I was as happy as a pig in shit.

Lets hope the obvious sequel pulls an Assassins Creed 2 and blows every ones mind. The transition from AC to AC2 went from average game to amazing and really concreted my love for that game, until all the rest came out and my interest started to dwindle again.

What do I want to see? well luckily I made an average list of things I want, cause you know, my opinion is Law. ha

• More Open World game play, Not a GTA V open world experience but I atlas want to feel like I'm making my mind up on how to get to my destination.
• More London and less Catacombs.
• Let me feel like a bad ass trained knight of the Order, not just a man that can drink a potion when he gets shot and feel better, that's almost as bad as a pat on the back.
• Tracking Collectibles, I missed some, I don't know where or on what level so I have to play the whole game again to get the last 4 achievements and platinum the game, I'm not happy about this! 
• More Lycans, You'll understand when you play the game.
• A tiny bit more colour to the pallet please, was almost impossible to play the game with the light on.
• More awesome science guns.
• Customisable moustache and facial hair, also the ability to stop and groom or oil beard in mirrors.

The foundations have been played, a world created, characters introduced and a conspiracy at hand, so lets see what they can do next.

feel the sadness!

I have Faith, flashes of pure third person genius happened from time to time so whats stopping them from Acing their second outing. 

At first I couldn't see where the average reviews where coming from?! I thought it harsh to score such a pretty game a 65 Metacritic, but like life teaches you looks aren't everything. But as time went by it became more apparent as combat grew old and story less interesting.

All criticism aside though its the first game Ive finished in a long time, due to illness and my lack of concentration at the minute. My brief return to work for 3 weeks distracted me, only to be signed off by the doctors again thanks to a medication change that isn't happening very fast at all.

Also the music ends halfway through the credits, I wonder if they thought no one would be sad enough to sit through them all, well I am.

Never fear though! PlayStation plus is here to save the day with 3 free PS4 games, make that 4. Ive already finished the heart wrenching feels fest that is Valiant Hearts

Firstly we have the annoyingly addictive Olli Olli 2 Welcome to Olliwood, I'm worse than awful at this game but I can see it being right up my brothers street.

Tasty indeed.

Secondly we have the uber stylish archer look a like Counterspy, I'm excited for this one as I've wanted to play this game for quiet some time now.

Last but not least we have New n Tasty- Oddworld: Abes Odysee, It already reminds me of my childhood and trying to play the game with little success. 

So a packed month this time around for me as a PS4 owner, Lets see how many games I can finish this month and not just start them.

Manic Army

Caleb, ManicallyDepressed-ModeratelyFunny

Also remember to check out my YouTube content https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCllx1-z8fVljqoOqJ41iw-Q

Never fear The Order 1886 is here.

My red velvet curtains.

Hello, long time no Blog!

Just spent the best part of a week or two getting over super flu!

Probably the sickest I've been in years in all honesty, it was rubbish. No games were played, no Blogs were written, nothing was done apart from sleeping and trying to sleep, but NEVER fear I'm feeling a little better, so today I write from a moderately tidy room with the curtains open and its not even 8 am.

I must be sick.

Ive been on a mad downward spiral recently and been in and out of doctors and hospitals having heart scans and blood tests to make sure my body can handle the new mood stabilisers i'll be put on soon.

So that's been my week in and out of doctors and hospitals, having meetings and scans, blood tests and speaking to people about my illness, its been pretty shitty being forced to relive all those horrible moments and explain them for the 100th time when all I want to do is move past it.

People draw super saiyan lycan beasts.

I did manage to grab a copy of The Order 1886, I'm enjoying my play through so far, I managed chapter 1-10 in my first sitting before I succumbed to the need for sleep. and my PS4 kept switching off. True Story.

Knowing the game is only 16 chapters long has stopped me from playing it since, as I don't want it to end, once its done the game becomes redundant, no multiplayer, no 'Lycan' mode, just a quick run through to clean up on the last few trophies and then back to Games shelf.

Sad life cycle but the only one it will get, I can imagine by this weekend Game and CEX will be mostly built up of second hand copies of a game every bodies finished, I would mostly be building forts out of all my copies if I could.

Touch my Moustache, no joke. FUCKING TOUCH IT.

Then there's the bundles that will no doubt appear left right and centre trying to sell the game some more to make up for its incredibly average Metacritic score of 65. not that Metacritic should matter, make your own minds up!

Making the game an Amber.

luckily for the guys and gals at Ready At Dawn the game is the most incredible thing my eyes have ever seen on a screen, multiple times I've stopped watching a cut scene and stood for overly long periods of time before I realise the game is in fact in motion.

This and my hunger for moustached characters Im very happy with what I've played so far, I know my journeys about to end but hopefully they do an Assassins Creed 2 and make a sequel thats one of the best titles released on the last generation console.

His blade is taking his spine for a ride.

Hopefully i can find my missing notebook of ideas and drafts and be back on the blog hype as of next week, sorry again for illness but I've been so depressed and out of it I nearly quit my job and become a farmer, true story.

Manic Army

Caleb -ManicallyDepressed-ModeratelyFunny.

Twitter-
https://twitter.com/WinslowBateman

Apotheon Review - Nappy Edition

APOTHEON

Truth be told I've been in a Zelda trance these last few days.

Fiery beginnings.

This ended when I got tired of dying on the final boss of A Link Between Worlds.

So today I switch on my ps4 kick back with a coffee and decide it's go time for Alientrap games Inc's APOTHEON this months free PS Plus game, which looks like it should be painted on the side of a pot.

Greek style.

The main gist of the story is you've been abandoned by the Gods, and shits gone bad, people are pillaging and destroying buildings.

My adventure starts as I wake up after a brief lay down on the floor and everything is on fire, Raiders pillaging the burning shells of houses, its now my job to help out the villagers.

My name is Nikandreos and I'm a helpaholic!

What a shell house might look like.

My basic controls involve X for the ability to jump.

I can pick up items with the Square.

Roll away from danger with the O.

I can drink potions to heal myself with ∆.

I intimidate my foes by punching in their general direction with the R2

I throw stuff at peoples head when you tap R1

I wield the power of my giant shield with L2

and can change my shield for a torch with L1

<----> on the D pad move between your weapons, potions and throwable objects.

Like he said he's a helpaholic with simple controls to help you along the way.

The game is mostly built up of oranges, reds, blacks and yellows again keeping in with the greek aesthetic and feels a lot like Guacamelee in Olympus, Your typical bad character wears a red nappy and your friends wear blue nappies, everything is set up in a neat and tidy manor.

Have a Guacamelee good time.

Its very smooth and quick to use, I love the way it doesn't clutter up your screen with over complicated customisation options making it easier to calculate an attacking or defensive play

Theres a lot of choice of combination of weapons and armour you unlock as you play through the game, slowly pimping your character as you work your way through tasks, feeling like a hack and slasher at first the game offers more than meets the eye the further you progress into the story

Sure it was.

The game has a beautiful art design, fun interactive world and a story involving Greek Gods, Sign me the fuck up.

I decide that every pot needs to die as I get Greek 'Link' on there ass smashing everything in sight

The first set of missions revolve around you helping the distressed villagers, Once you save the Apothecary he shows you how to craft items, handy.

At the Blacksmiths house you acquire a shield and leather armour, basic but its a start.

I then decide its time to scare the hunters as I destroy everything in there hideout, they take the time to teach you how to throw objects ranging from javelins to bows, knives and greek Molotov's. Fiery

Next the granary for a nice fresh cut loaf, Thats a lie, I have to stop them from taking all the grain as supplies are short and demand is high. This is a simple task for a helpful nappy wearing murder machine.

He then takes an arrow to the knee.

Last but not least I need to rescue some prisoners, I'm taking it that these are freshly captured villagers and not rapists and murders or they can just stay there and rot.

After saving the day and completing all the objectives its time to mess up there leader lovingly named Ophion the tyrant, I decide the best thing to do is cleave him in two with my big shiny axe.

Now thanks to my axe happy chopping arm I'm declared the modestly named 'Chosen Champion'

As I stand before Hera, Zeus's wife, she turns me into an absolute boss, informing me that Zeus is being a little bitch and screwed everyone over like a child throwing his toys out the pram, Its now my job to strip all Gods of there power, Zeus included and ascend to the next level of Badass. offering salvation to my people along the way!

Its not as easy as I first thought, Zeus runs such a tight shift, if you 'Link' any of the surrounding smash able objects guards demand you pay Zeus or die, a lot like Skyrim.

Time to turn Zeus into my little bitch I think

Manic Army

Caleb.

Spelunky's a bitch

So apparently confirming Half Life 3 is a death wish  on the Internet as its wanted so bad.

I doubt it will ever come out as it honestly doesn't need to, Valve makes so much money with steam its silly to release any game at the minute, they may as well save it till steams on the down and pump some life back into the stocks with the ultimate box collection 3, Half Life 3, Team Fortress 3 and Portal 3, like the orange box with numbers or add Left 4 Dead 3 to confirm more 3s.

Today's post is short and spontaneous, just how I like my woman, saying that I'm 6.4 so most people are short compared to me.

The reason why its so short is I'm currently editing some video that we shot last night, I'm trying to turn it into something for tomorrow/Monday, seems as I'm fairly new to the editing world its taking a while!

I did however finish Life is Strange yesterday, as well as shoot 45 minutes of video, so cutting that down to ten minutes Is how I'm spending my Thursday.

Spelunky's a bitch

Manic Army

Caleb.

Half Life 3 CONFIRMED.

Its really hard to keep motivated when you feel like no ones reading your blog.

I automatically assume 1 million people will read it every day in the space of my first month and dismiss myself as useless from the go.

I'll just fail forever.

This being a curse as my mood can plummet in a few hours, everything takes time to grow and I hope the people that are reading really do enjoy my ramblings, remember to like and comment and follow my google plus account and other forms of social media so I can keep unto date on what to write about.

The more outlets I post on, the more I realise you pay to advertise a lot of the time, I know you pay to advertise but my god they really do just want your money, so word of mouth it is.

So its hard to not get a little bummed out on a daily basis when you have nothing better to do than stalk your own page.

This week I shot my very first YouTube video which was amazing fun, also learning to edit as I went along was an interesting task but I feel like it wasn't completely awful.

Hoping to shoot some more today in the same vain, playing classic games on the Gamecube or Wii  and filming as we go along, should be fun and hopefully you will see some progression as we record more.

Matt's a super fun bro and a very close friend, an amazing photographer as well so check out his Twitter page https://twitter.com/PhotogMT

Tall and Small seems like a suitable title for our grand YouTube adventure, so please someone be my first sub and comment on what you think and what could be done better.

I want to make something funny and unique and so far its two friends playing old games having a giggle so your feedback really does matter to me.

I brought some PS4 bargains this week as well, first up is Square Enix's time travel friendly Life is Strange and indie title Lone Survivor for a combined £6.00 instead of £14 so look out for those offers this week, always looking to improve my library with content as I'm an indie game lover.

Happy Caleb.

Just make it already.

The pile is now back on track and slowly growing more and more, my ability to finish them becoming less and less as my time now has to be divided into working as well, so I'm going to spend most of this morning playing Life is Strange because guess what?

Life is in fact very strange.

Also is anyone else hype at the fact Bethesda are at E3 this year?

The Evil Within 4 confirmed, Dishonoured 4 confirmed, Fallout 4 confirmed. Skyrim 4 confirmed , Half Life 3 confirmed, why Half Life?

Because its the internet and some one will take that seriously.

Manic Army!

Caleb

YouTube Content, A recipe for disaster Mark II.

My Second attempt at YouTube content should be uploaded today.

Do people follow using Google +?

Hopefully people will enjoy what me and my friend Matt created

The quality of this video is through the roof compared to our first shoddy outing, stick with it! This ones better!

Please Subscribe to my YouTube Account -
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCllx1-z8fVljqoOqJ41iw-Q

Add me on the Twitter - https://twitter.com/WinslowBateman

Follow me on Google + https://plus.google.com/u/0/104409237928752502151/posts

Please feel free to comment on the blogs as well, criticism welcome!

Manic Army

Caleb, ManicallyDepressed - ModeratelyFunny!

Future Proof, Fame not included.

A strange week for me this week, 

Future proof, fame not included.

Firstly I was diagnosed as Bipolar which is a huge relief and a long time coming, but to finally hear those words is the best thing that could happen as now I can be treated accordingly, which means more blood tests and heart scans!

I love blood tests so fucking much it's untrue.

Then to celebrate the diagnosis I brought an Elgato HD60 to start streaming some gameplay, I then realised my laptop couldn't handle the power of full 1080p 60fps streaming and recording, I then made a decision based on it being a success.

Like any reasonably sound of mind person would do, I brought a MacBook Pro.

Normal people wouldn't do this but I think its part of my charm.

So now every blog is delivered from a laptop I'm still not sure how to use, so badly so I had to text a friend, from MacBook to MacBook I should say,  about how to hashtag. #TrueStory

Dollar bills and explosions.

My week has mostly been filled with downloading Beta's

Battlefield Hardline was the first beta, my normal blog should be up in the next few days showing my 1337 skill set, If everything goes well I could technically record gameplay of the beta and narrate my blog over the top of it, like a white Morgan Freeman.

Secondly I emailed the Neverwinter devs about getting a place in the closed beta, a Xbox One MMORPG based around the dungeons and dragons franchise.

Greek battles never looked so good.

I was lucky enough to get a place so I'm intrigued and excited to see whats to offer.

So normally I have a list of games I've finished, after the last few weeks I've finished close to 10 games so its strange to not finish one at all, The list is starting to grow as I add Saints Row IV and Apotheon, a free Playstation Plus game for ps4 users!

Transistor and Rogue Legacy are the two amazing games free with Playstation Plus this month, Transistor is a science fiction RPG that follows the story of voiceless singer Red as she travels through a beautifully handprinted world fighting an enemy known as the process, My personal game of 2014 and Rogue Legacy an indie platform game, the goal is to explore a randomly generated castle, defeat four bosses in four unique environments and then defeat the final boss.

Jen Zee's amazing digital art.

I finally finished my adventure after 27 hours. 

So from me to anyone reading this that hasn't played either they are a must own for any growing Playstation Library.

Once upon a time I contacted the artist for Transistor wishing to buy some of Jen Zee's amazing art only to have my heart broken when she told me it was all done digitally and there wasn't a original copy, I was then told to check out the supergiant games store and buy some one of the posters and having it never work for me.

I still mourn to this day, another true story.

Lets hope the next week brings more finished games.

Never one to force the very natural work flow I've adopted hopefully some video content will start to be uploaded in the next few weeks.

Enjoy your Friday and download those games!

Koi Koi

Caleb

Follow the mindless tweets of a troubled individual at 
https://twitter.com/WinslowBateman

Lets Play Bipolar.

So I'm running out of things to write about at the minute, all the balls are rolling for me to be integrated back into normal day to day life and I'm finding it harder to find the time to sit and have a good write.

Everything's better with a cat picture.

I need some true structure to these blogs and updates. I'm getting somewhat lost with what to cover and what to say. Am I moving backwards?

I think not, after a long, hard 9 year slog of being in and out of the doctors I've finally been diagnosed as Bi Polar, we've all known this for a long time but actually getting to see a psychiatrist and getting that diagnosis has been the hardest part, but finally I can say that I'am Bi Polar, hence the name!

On a different note.

I started talking to a friend about making some let's play videos for YouTube. 

Best Co-op game ever? Maybe!

We have a very methodical way of playing games, no progression until a level is 100% finished, this is wonderful and stressful at the same time, my fondest memory to date was our Ray-man sessions. 

I'd like to think our friendship was forged around this game, it's enough to make or break any couple, it just made us stronger.

What followed this was Smash Bros, in typical fashion the pupil now beats the master in this case.

Fist bumps and high fives, cheering and swearing. A running commentary of everything to come sounds like fun, all we need is a camera and it could go up in one take.

The start of something beautiful, and HD.

Hopefully I'll iron out all the kinks in my armor soon.

I started to invest some money in this venture by purchasing an Elgato HD60. I want to capture all that high definition game play, also a pod-cast microphone to add a running commentary of the stresses I'm feeling.

We also looked at another idea of recording us playing old games, in this case it was the GameCube classic Monkey Ball. we choose a mode, captured the room, no game-play due to static on the screen and us not knowing how too, we described what was happening and everything else feel into place.

Monkey Ball!

It was a very natural process, an 18 minute video was recorded over a tense game of monkey target, the aim being to roll a monkey down a hill and to hit the target, jokes went back and forth about dole's sponsorship of all things banana and how the first ball pit came about.

Hopefully I can chop it together into a shorter video and you can see the basic life of two recluse nerds having a good time reliving childhood games.

Enjoy the bad quality of sound, join my adventure as my knowledge grows and be part of mine and Matt's little adventure into the YouTube space, next time It'll be another classic game with a better microphone so you can watch as it grows into something cheap and beautiful.

Koi Koi

Caleb

Lets play Tales from the borderlands, Review

Tales from the borderlands

You heard me right.

As a fan of Borderlands and Telltales Games Studio, late one night, red bull in hand, No money in my account and plenty of games to play, I thought to myself '£3.99's fine'.

It's that simple, I Brought it.

£3.99 not being fine. My ever decreasing bank account screaming 'why, Caleb why?'

Where to begin, Telltale Games ever expanding library gets bigger with a surprise episodic based series based on the hilarious yet completely crazy Borderlands series, like it's counterparts The Walking Dead season 1-2, The Wolf Among Us and Game of Thrones this series will be split into a 5 part episodic based story around two loveable characters Rhys and Fiona.

Sadness comes over me first as I mourn the memory of my Walking Dead Season 1 save, completely redundant on my Xbox 360 not to mention my Season 2 save which I never got passed episode 1.

Glitch, never. Just bad lighting

First impressions, looks like borderlands, that's because I'm looking at the title screen, Still it feels more fitting than Borderlands - The Pre Sequel. Not that I didn't enjoy my time as a zero gravity Claptrap, I just couldn't get into it like Borderlands 2.

Episode 1. 'Zer0 Sum'

I remember that character, Fuck knows about his story though, I used to drink...A lot, 2 years sober. Boom! Sober bomb, back to it.

It also doesn't feel as glitchy as The Walking Dead season 1, some character decisions being made by slow frame rate and times decisions being missed,but this isn't a Walking Dead review!

The villian, once upon a time, maybe.

A little bit of back story is fed to the audience, Handsome jack used to run Hyperion and died trying to claim the planet of Pandora as his own, Important life lesson to come! Pirates will always be remembered hero's on the other hand will be forgotten. so act an arse!

You play as Rhys voiced by every video game character in the world 'Troy Baker', Just realised he was Pagan Min, the more you know! Rhys is a company man.

He also gets punched in the cock by a man named Yoshimuto as he's dragged through the dirt and told to start from the start about his story. let's guess, I'll be replaying his memories and how he got to that moment in his life

John.

First things first Rhys looks like John Mayor.

Now that handsome Jack is dead he's celebrating his promotion he hasn't yet earned on his way to see Henderson, Turns out Henderson's dead, dum dum dummmmmmm!

Your greeted by your nemesis Hugo Vasquez, who sounds like he's voiced by the guy who voices Joe Swanson, Professional.

He goes on about how every spaceship in the universe is shaped like a dick and that every man has a Destiny, as he says this Henderson floats past in the back ground dead.

Behind you buddy.

Now Vasquez has Henderson's job after his tragic death he keeps his promise and promotes you to 'Vice Assistant Janitor'

Details are revealed about Vasquez setting up a deal to buy a vault key on Pandora so now Rhys, Yvette and the badly named 'nerdy guy' decide to ruin his career, all these decisions being made by me as I'm the super vengeful type, I'm sure I would have got there in the end but I choose the vengeful way.

The game is crisp and gorgeous at this point, no game crashing glitches, no decision missing skips in frame rate just a good quality and funny script, some clever gags about dicks and death and a shiny lick of HD paint, hugely surprised and wildly pleased by this I carry on my journey.

He's a nice guy really.

We encounter a problem, Only a small 10 million credit one, no worries my nerdy accounting friend clicks a button on his glasses and that's it done, 'It's easy to counterfeit money when you work in accounts' he chirps. ha!

Hyper violence in the form of people getting shot by people that get shot by other people that get shot by other people that get run over by me in Vasquez custom made ride, the only perk he went on about in our brief meeting when I decided to ruin his life. I crush a skag as I cruise along on Pandora listening to Jungle, The band not the genre.

The details you tell the merchant, August, involve the key being used to screw over the biggest dick in Hyperion, Stuff happens and things go wrong, what? I won't ruin the fun for you.

There's always two sides to one story.

Enter Fiona , Con Artist, Pandora Scumbag, Introduced whilst your being dragged across the floor still.

Her side of the story starts slightly different to Rhys's and how the vault key came to shatter.

Fiona lives in a Town called Hollowpoint which is based in a giant cave with her sister Sasha and master criminal Felix, the theft of the key was there biggest heist yet.

SPOILER ALERT! if you plan on playing look away now. Or maybe just don't read.

Enter giant fake model Vault key.

To solidify the fact your a shady character your given a gun with one bullet, in case of emergencies
and a wanted poster of your cell shady face for everyone to see.

I enjoy my time in Hollowpoint, as I walk down some scary high street two little psychos welcome a Pandoran gentleman to town by both stabbing him repeatedly in the face, I take his money and move on my way, food costs and all that.

Cell shady character .

One killer feature is the use of loot chests, still in keeping with the borderlands aesthetic, yellow beams appear showing money is in fact in that box.

At first I was unsure of what to expect but this game is actually brilliant, tapping directly into my crude sense of humour, adding new depth to a familiar world in the click and point adventure style I'm truly growing to love.

I think I'm finding this adventure even more enjoyable as I've just finished playing D4, that's how long I left this blog in draft form.

Koi Koi

Caleb.

Does Assassins Creed need a break, My weekly round up.

Cut that shit out.

Today I'm writing all day, researching and getting ahead of myself.

Instead of having a mad four hours of Typing and Editing.

If you could see the shit I chop out of these.

I have two Reviews coming up which I'm going to try and post this week, One being Telltales Games Tales from the Borderlands and secondly Facepalm games ported puzzler The swapper.

Both currently in an 8 page ruff format of writing, the stage I hate the most.

So I've had a moderately busy week of game play.

I got drawn into EA's 75% off sale and brought the deluxe edition of Titanfall for £10, a huge fan of the original Modern Warfare its nice to see what Respawn Entertainment could think up in the style of a new accessible FPS.

Giant titans and parkour, love it.

Titanfail Parkour Edition.

I like the use of AI controlled grunts on the map, at first I was sceptical of the 8 vs 8 play style, thinking the maps where to big for such a small number of players but in reality I'm always in a fire-fight with someone be it a Titan, Pilot, Spectre or low level grunt.

You never feel like your doing awful as your always engaged with someone and killing grunts offers the same satisfaction as breaking a camping pilots neck after you wall run to his or her location.

There's nothing worse than joining a game late as a complete noob with seasoned players constantly dominating you as you die repeatedly. That makes for an unpleasant experience and a game getting shelved early in its life cycle.

26 hours more?

Also in game related news I finally beat Cellar Door Games wonderful title Rogue Legacy after 26 hours and 179 deaths, only to start New game + straight away and start the hunt for my next time consuming gold trophy, 'complete the game twice'! on it.

One major boss down and 150 levels up, I start my journey into the forest to hunt a giant orb spitting flame skull!

Saints Row IV has already been momentarily shelved whilst I obsesses about Titanfall some more.

Not intentionally, as its my Sunset overdrive replacement. Open world, over the top powers, aliens. dive in dive out game-play, still sounds like a good time to me.

The list of games I'm currently playing has shrunk down and grown at the same time.

Mine was Red and Green.

Assassins Creed Unity got traded in whilst it still retained value and turned into an Alt J vinyl I wanted, my thought process behind it was that 'I brought it for £20 at Christmas and it will be that cheap again', an impulse buy, same as the last 3 assassins games, I wanted to love them and make an effort to see them through to the end, I just lose interest very fast.

My question of the day 'Does Assassins Creed need to stop being an annual game and take some time to reboot what once was the best games of the year?'

Sales figures disagree with what I think as Unity was more popular than Edwards Pirate affair, but Unity was also broken as fuck whereas Black-flag worked straight out of the box, so now it just feels like there realising broken games to meet that deadline.

I never make it pass chapter 5, slightly bored and lost with the plot I never see them through to the end, that's what happened with Unity. One day my desire for a Assassins Creed game will be through the roof but nothing has ever come close to Assassins Creed 2's perfection.

I say it time and time again that I like to think I'm a very diverse player, I have my finger in many pies, I never truly sit in one camp when it comes to consoles.

I entered this dick measuring contest knowing I'd own all 3, which I've never done in my life, mainly down to always being broke as a teenager.

Also I don't think Wii U counts when it comes to the Xbone - PSKitkat fight.

Cops and robbers just got better!

I'll also be playing the Battlefield Hardline beta from tomorrow morning so expect a review of that to come in the same style as my Evolve and Halo 5 beta.

Hope your enjoying my blogs and don't be scared to follow me on Twitter- https://twitter.com/WinslowBateman

Add me on PSN - FI5HSTICKS_AGAIN

Xbox Gamertag - FI5H5TICKS

looking to meet new players on a daily basis to run through Saints Row IV on coop and dominate some Titanfall and Destiny Raids.Still!

Koi Koi

Caleb